The idea of happiness as the goal of life needs some analysis.
The goal of life should not be happiness. The goal of life should be to make the best of it. One is said to have made the best of life when one is totally satisfied with the way one’s life is.
Living for happiness in every moment is a recipe for disaster. By self-indulgent living you may be able to get happiness for yourself in every moment, but that happiness will invariably be fleeting and insecure. Secure and lasting happiness comes out of doing something “worthwhile”.
Worthwhile things are those which also include the interests of the community of which you are a part. It means genuinely being useful to others, instead of using others. You can use others for your happiness and be harmless at the same time; but still that’s not a worthwhile living if you are not contributing anything toward the overall wellbeing of the community.
Now this is a subtle point. There are many ways in which one can be useful to others (i.e. by enabling collective wellbeing) without even realizing it. Remaining faithful to one’s spouse is one example of “worthwhile” living; which happens at some cost to the self, as one has to turn down the prospects of greater happiness which present themselves moment to moment. The payoff of faithfulness is realized in the long run. It won’t be in the form of the happiness one has passed up by not being unfaithful. The happiness of this payoff is of a different nature. It’s in the form of calm and lasting sense of satisfaction from life.
Not being promiscuous before you find a commitment-worthy partner is also a type of “worthwhile” living; even though you may not solidly realize it. Because it shows strong will which is, in turn, an indication of reliability. This, apart from giving higher wellbeing to your partner when you’ve found one, increases the general wellbeing of the community; for the presence of such strong-willed individuals will enable trust in the people. In the society where many people are of “loose character”, people find it hard to trust others, and tend to be more anxious, and thus, less satisfied.
The first example is indicative of the behavior by which the other’s (one’s spouse) wellbeing is directly looked after; while in the second example the general wellbeing of the community is indirectly being contributed to just by being good. But these are just examples. I use sexual behavior for such examples because sex has better connection with happiness and suffering than anything else. And what I said there is, of course, not necessarily to be strictly followed as a rule in every situation. The point to be understood is, trying to fill every moment with happiness (that characterized by excitement) for oneself is quite often screwing one’s long-term prospect of happy (in the sense of contentment) life.
The good feeling of satisfaction that arises out of “worthwhile” living is not without a reason. The subconscious logic is that when one lives with due regard to others’ wellbeing, one is respected and cherished as a person by the community. Being respected is the key to the high-quality happiness. Now one may scoff at it saying it is but selfishness in disguise; but then since you have the “self”, this subtle kind of selfishness is healthy and rather essential, and not bad at all. That you take on some discomfort for the greater good (of collective wellbeing), even though at a deeper level it is going to benefit you, is altruism at its best.
Having a satisfactory life over a long period of time (not in moment to moment evaluation) is also generally called a happy life. In that sense if one means that the goal of life is to make a “happy life” then it’s fine. But if the goal-happiness means every moment one has to pounce on what brings one the greatest pleasure, without any regard for anything or anyone else but oneself, that’s a myopic and naïve approach to happiness. He who lives like that is in a huge need of good luck.
Direct pursuit of happiness is a narcissistic one. More than being happy, it is important to have a virtuous life. And the happiness it will generate as a by-product will be the happiness like no other.
The goal of life should not be happiness. The goal of life should be to make the best of it. One is said to have made the best of life when one is totally satisfied with the way one’s life is.
Living for happiness in every moment is a recipe for disaster. By self-indulgent living you may be able to get happiness for yourself in every moment, but that happiness will invariably be fleeting and insecure. Secure and lasting happiness comes out of doing something “worthwhile”.
Worthwhile things are those which also include the interests of the community of which you are a part. It means genuinely being useful to others, instead of using others. You can use others for your happiness and be harmless at the same time; but still that’s not a worthwhile living if you are not contributing anything toward the overall wellbeing of the community.
Now this is a subtle point. There are many ways in which one can be useful to others (i.e. by enabling collective wellbeing) without even realizing it. Remaining faithful to one’s spouse is one example of “worthwhile” living; which happens at some cost to the self, as one has to turn down the prospects of greater happiness which present themselves moment to moment. The payoff of faithfulness is realized in the long run. It won’t be in the form of the happiness one has passed up by not being unfaithful. The happiness of this payoff is of a different nature. It’s in the form of calm and lasting sense of satisfaction from life.
Not being promiscuous before you find a commitment-worthy partner is also a type of “worthwhile” living; even though you may not solidly realize it. Because it shows strong will which is, in turn, an indication of reliability. This, apart from giving higher wellbeing to your partner when you’ve found one, increases the general wellbeing of the community; for the presence of such strong-willed individuals will enable trust in the people. In the society where many people are of “loose character”, people find it hard to trust others, and tend to be more anxious, and thus, less satisfied.
The first example is indicative of the behavior by which the other’s (one’s spouse) wellbeing is directly looked after; while in the second example the general wellbeing of the community is indirectly being contributed to just by being good. But these are just examples. I use sexual behavior for such examples because sex has better connection with happiness and suffering than anything else. And what I said there is, of course, not necessarily to be strictly followed as a rule in every situation. The point to be understood is, trying to fill every moment with happiness (that characterized by excitement) for oneself is quite often screwing one’s long-term prospect of happy (in the sense of contentment) life.
The good feeling of satisfaction that arises out of “worthwhile” living is not without a reason. The subconscious logic is that when one lives with due regard to others’ wellbeing, one is respected and cherished as a person by the community. Being respected is the key to the high-quality happiness. Now one may scoff at it saying it is but selfishness in disguise; but then since you have the “self”, this subtle kind of selfishness is healthy and rather essential, and not bad at all. That you take on some discomfort for the greater good (of collective wellbeing), even though at a deeper level it is going to benefit you, is altruism at its best.
Having a satisfactory life over a long period of time (not in moment to moment evaluation) is also generally called a happy life. In that sense if one means that the goal of life is to make a “happy life” then it’s fine. But if the goal-happiness means every moment one has to pounce on what brings one the greatest pleasure, without any regard for anything or anyone else but oneself, that’s a myopic and naïve approach to happiness. He who lives like that is in a huge need of good luck.
Direct pursuit of happiness is a narcissistic one. More than being happy, it is important to have a virtuous life. And the happiness it will generate as a by-product will be the happiness like no other.
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