I came across a blog post the other day in which this female was venting her anger for the male species for their certain behavior towards women; like, ogling women, making gestures of sexual nature, sexual advances, and rape. Okay. Such behavior on the part of men isn't appropriate in civilized societies. But wait a minute. She goes on to say things on the lines of – if men can roam around in shorts, why can't women wear mini-skirts and bikinis, and so on. You get the idea. Sounds like a valid question? If men can expose their bodies without being scared of getting sexually harassed, then why do women get the hard time! Men are perverts! Or are they?
We have been hearing things like this for years. In modern times the talks of men-women equality pass for some wisdom. But the assertion that women can do whatever men can – especially in the domain of sexuality – requires deep thinking and analysis.
Men and women are not the same. It's a grave mistake to think they are. Men and women are different both biologically and psychologically which, in turn, is the reason for their different sexual behavior. Feminists (and people at large) who call men perverts fail to understand that men's sexual behavior towards women is different from women's sexual behavior towards men, not because men carry the vice of perversion and women have the virtue of sanity and control; but it is so because men and women are fundamentally different from each other, and that their behavior has an evolutionary basis rooted in their respective gender roles from the time we were monkeys.
Males are biologically wired to be sexually bold and aggressive. Females are passive when it comes to making sexual advances. It's a male's job to seduce, and female's to get seduced. A female is wired such that she won't make bold sexual moves; she is designed to act overly careful; because a female has greater responsibility to carry after the sexual act (for it's she who gets pregnant.) Hence, she would act pricey when the male makes advances. It's the male who has to make an effort to woo the female. This is the reason why males are naturally more audacious when it comes to making sexual moves. Note that ogling boobs and butts, or making sexual gestures, is considered indecency or "perversion" only in civilized human societies, because we have sophisticated means of inter-sexual interactions now. These things are not intrinsically indecent. In fact, it's the only way animals interact sexually. Even rape is a by-product of civilization.
I agree that the jungle rules can't be followed in civilized societies that we live in; besides, as we have pretty sophisticated mechanisms in place for finding mating partners, such bold sexual moves towards random women aren't necessary; and quite a few of them are even grossly indecent. However, the modern thinking and conditioning through which women are nowadays made to believe that they are same as men, and that they can do and wear anything that men can – while totally ignoring the fundamental gender differences – is also not such a good thing. We have not yet been long enough into the civilization to get our biology adapted through evolution to the new civilized ways of the world. When it comes to sexuality, we are still pretty much like our animal ancestors.
I am not trying to justify the indecency of men towards women. Of course, we have to be matured enough to control our biological forces, since we are no more savages living in the jungle. Women's sexual harassment by men, no doubt, should be adequately punished.
But at the same time, importantly, we must also understand the fundamental difference between the two sexes, and chuck the if-men-can-why-can't-women logic. This logic is ridiculous.
Exposing the body is for sexual attraction. In fact, at a fundamental level there's no other reason behind trying to look good but attracting the members of the opposite sex. More often than not the desire to look good is essentially the desire to look sexually attractive. When men flaunt their looks, they are trying to attract women, whether they know it or not. And they can do it without the danger of harassment because they are physically strong. But women can't do that. If women tried acting like men, then because of their physical weakness, they are subjected to the possibility of unwanted sexual moves from men which might feel like harassment; and they know it well beforehand. This prior knowledge of the danger must make them act rationally. They can't knowingly run into the danger; that's irrational. Men have no risk in exposing their bodies. Women do have the risk. If you play with the fire, you get burnt.
This might enrage many people (especially women) who have never looked at the issue from this angle; but it's worth giving a deep thought.
Of course, we have the laws to protect the weak, and we must protect women because they are weak. But that shouldn't mean women would transfer all their responsibility to the law and keep running into the risk. Special protection must be accompanied by special responsibilities. As a weaker section of the society they are getting special treatment in the form of protection by the laws specifically meant for women. So, prudent and responsible women should acknowledge their gender vulnerability and not be sexually bold, which includes and is not limited to wearing provocative cloths, making sexually explicit remarks in public etc, which might invite the undesirable sexual moves from men. What is considered "bold" may differ from society to society.
Though it's not a perfect solution; but it's still a rational and responsible behavior on part of women. As for the perfect solution, there is none – because men are men and women are women; and they are different. Expecting the same sexual behavior of them is not realistic. Education and social conditioning solves the problem on the surface; but beneath the surface it is there to remain. It's one of ills of civilization we have got to deal with – at least till the evolution has it's way in changing our biology.
It's to be noted that I am talking about compromise on part of both sexes. Men have to compromise on their sexual tendencies that are naturally bolder than women's; and women have to compromise on their desire to act sexually bolder than they can physically afford. The uncompromising men should be caught by the law; and the uncompromising women will likely be caught by men (even if not literally). Asking men alone to compromise isn't fair and won't ease the problem.
Will conclude by quoting an excerpt from the article which inspired me to write this one —
Either admit that women (as a class) need protection, and that they are more vulnerable to abuse. Or admit that women are equals, and that they do not need protection or special treatment. In the first case, a special right (or protection) will have to be accompanied by certain responsibilities on part of women. In the second, women can do what they want, but they had better take care of themselves when shit hits the fan.
We have been hearing things like this for years. In modern times the talks of men-women equality pass for some wisdom. But the assertion that women can do whatever men can – especially in the domain of sexuality – requires deep thinking and analysis.
Men and women are not the same. It's a grave mistake to think they are. Men and women are different both biologically and psychologically which, in turn, is the reason for their different sexual behavior. Feminists (and people at large) who call men perverts fail to understand that men's sexual behavior towards women is different from women's sexual behavior towards men, not because men carry the vice of perversion and women have the virtue of sanity and control; but it is so because men and women are fundamentally different from each other, and that their behavior has an evolutionary basis rooted in their respective gender roles from the time we were monkeys.
Males are biologically wired to be sexually bold and aggressive. Females are passive when it comes to making sexual advances. It's a male's job to seduce, and female's to get seduced. A female is wired such that she won't make bold sexual moves; she is designed to act overly careful; because a female has greater responsibility to carry after the sexual act (for it's she who gets pregnant.) Hence, she would act pricey when the male makes advances. It's the male who has to make an effort to woo the female. This is the reason why males are naturally more audacious when it comes to making sexual moves. Note that ogling boobs and butts, or making sexual gestures, is considered indecency or "perversion" only in civilized human societies, because we have sophisticated means of inter-sexual interactions now. These things are not intrinsically indecent. In fact, it's the only way animals interact sexually. Even rape is a by-product of civilization.
I agree that the jungle rules can't be followed in civilized societies that we live in; besides, as we have pretty sophisticated mechanisms in place for finding mating partners, such bold sexual moves towards random women aren't necessary; and quite a few of them are even grossly indecent. However, the modern thinking and conditioning through which women are nowadays made to believe that they are same as men, and that they can do and wear anything that men can – while totally ignoring the fundamental gender differences – is also not such a good thing. We have not yet been long enough into the civilization to get our biology adapted through evolution to the new civilized ways of the world. When it comes to sexuality, we are still pretty much like our animal ancestors.
I am not trying to justify the indecency of men towards women. Of course, we have to be matured enough to control our biological forces, since we are no more savages living in the jungle. Women's sexual harassment by men, no doubt, should be adequately punished.
But at the same time, importantly, we must also understand the fundamental difference between the two sexes, and chuck the if-men-can-why-can't-women logic. This logic is ridiculous.
Exposing the body is for sexual attraction. In fact, at a fundamental level there's no other reason behind trying to look good but attracting the members of the opposite sex. More often than not the desire to look good is essentially the desire to look sexually attractive. When men flaunt their looks, they are trying to attract women, whether they know it or not. And they can do it without the danger of harassment because they are physically strong. But women can't do that. If women tried acting like men, then because of their physical weakness, they are subjected to the possibility of unwanted sexual moves from men which might feel like harassment; and they know it well beforehand. This prior knowledge of the danger must make them act rationally. They can't knowingly run into the danger; that's irrational. Men have no risk in exposing their bodies. Women do have the risk. If you play with the fire, you get burnt.
This might enrage many people (especially women) who have never looked at the issue from this angle; but it's worth giving a deep thought.
Of course, we have the laws to protect the weak, and we must protect women because they are weak. But that shouldn't mean women would transfer all their responsibility to the law and keep running into the risk. Special protection must be accompanied by special responsibilities. As a weaker section of the society they are getting special treatment in the form of protection by the laws specifically meant for women. So, prudent and responsible women should acknowledge their gender vulnerability and not be sexually bold, which includes and is not limited to wearing provocative cloths, making sexually explicit remarks in public etc, which might invite the undesirable sexual moves from men. What is considered "bold" may differ from society to society.
Though it's not a perfect solution; but it's still a rational and responsible behavior on part of women. As for the perfect solution, there is none – because men are men and women are women; and they are different. Expecting the same sexual behavior of them is not realistic. Education and social conditioning solves the problem on the surface; but beneath the surface it is there to remain. It's one of ills of civilization we have got to deal with – at least till the evolution has it's way in changing our biology.
It's to be noted that I am talking about compromise on part of both sexes. Men have to compromise on their sexual tendencies that are naturally bolder than women's; and women have to compromise on their desire to act sexually bolder than they can physically afford. The uncompromising men should be caught by the law; and the uncompromising women will likely be caught by men (even if not literally). Asking men alone to compromise isn't fair and won't ease the problem.
Will conclude by quoting an excerpt from the article which inspired me to write this one —
Either admit that women (as a class) need protection, and that they are more vulnerable to abuse. Or admit that women are equals, and that they do not need protection or special treatment. In the first case, a special right (or protection) will have to be accompanied by certain responsibilities on part of women. In the second, women can do what they want, but they had better take care of themselves when shit hits the fan.
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