Romantic love is like strong intoxication. In the peak of the experience, it gives immense pleasure and happiness but stagnates one's development in every way. Like the whole purpose of life was to feel just this. Every other thing creases to matter. Life comes to a standstill. A string of monotonous, though euphoric, moments passing one after another. Same thoughts. Same images. Nothing else is visible to the mind but the object of fixation...
And towards what end? Whatever the "victim" is deluded with, the only purpose behind romantic love is mating and reproduction. NOTHING ELSE. It's Nature's requirement and we are used to carry it out. With such cruelty! How magnificent the trap! And who says Nature isn't marvelous!
People write poems, sing songs, create all sorts of art around love. They say love is sacred, love is God, love is this, love is that... Pity! Love, romantic love, is the most outrageous joke Nature plays with humans.
Do I sound like I am against romantic love? Actually, no. I am against no indulgence as such; for there's no point in fighting Nature. It's just about being aware of the truth. Only when you know the truth of any suffering, you get the power to choose not to suffer, to an extent.
Update: Received a very pertinent comment on this article from a friend on Facebook. Thought it will be useful, hence adding here. The comment goes thus –
My reply to the comment –
By "'joke" I did not mean Nature's mechanism of ensuring the offspring's survival chances. That's indeed very sensible. What I referred to is what people unaware of this mechanism feel about romantic love. Things like, meant-to-be partners, forever-together, soul-mates etc etc and the unrealistic expectations thereof.
They don't even know that their love isn't based on reason, but is the outcome of "brain chemistry" (that's why the saying, love knows no reasons). People fall in romantic love even with those who don't possess likable qualities otherwise (and even with those they don't know!). And when the effect of romantic love wanes, they wonder what went wrong!
Hence the joke.
Though it's not a joke in itself, the way it makes people suffer – for the reasons mostly unknown to them – that makes it come off as a joke.
For example, what to say about a person who is crying (or worse, considering suicide) because his lover left him for someone else? Apparently, he hasn't understood the mechanism of romantic love, hence the unrealistic expectations and consequent tragic state. For such people (which is to mean, most people) it is like a joke being played with them!
To view the entire discussion thread click here.
And towards what end? Whatever the "victim" is deluded with, the only purpose behind romantic love is mating and reproduction. NOTHING ELSE. It's Nature's requirement and we are used to carry it out. With such cruelty! How magnificent the trap! And who says Nature isn't marvelous!
People write poems, sing songs, create all sorts of art around love. They say love is sacred, love is God, love is this, love is that... Pity! Love, romantic love, is the most outrageous joke Nature plays with humans.
Do I sound like I am against romantic love? Actually, no. I am against no indulgence as such; for there's no point in fighting Nature. It's just about being aware of the truth. Only when you know the truth of any suffering, you get the power to choose not to suffer, to an extent.
Update: Received a very pertinent comment on this article from a friend on Facebook. Thought it will be useful, hence adding here. The comment goes thus –
Since human infants require an extended period of care, an emotional bond between the mating couple furthers the survival chances of the offspring. It is not a joke of nature (of which we are a part), it is a very sensible strategy. In essence: Babies wish for their parents to love each other.
My reply to the comment –
By "'joke" I did not mean Nature's mechanism of ensuring the offspring's survival chances. That's indeed very sensible. What I referred to is what people unaware of this mechanism feel about romantic love. Things like, meant-to-be partners, forever-together, soul-mates etc etc and the unrealistic expectations thereof.
They don't even know that their love isn't based on reason, but is the outcome of "brain chemistry" (that's why the saying, love knows no reasons). People fall in romantic love even with those who don't possess likable qualities otherwise (and even with those they don't know!). And when the effect of romantic love wanes, they wonder what went wrong!
Hence the joke.
Though it's not a joke in itself, the way it makes people suffer – for the reasons mostly unknown to them – that makes it come off as a joke.
For example, what to say about a person who is crying (or worse, considering suicide) because his lover left him for someone else? Apparently, he hasn't understood the mechanism of romantic love, hence the unrealistic expectations and consequent tragic state. For such people (which is to mean, most people) it is like a joke being played with them!
To view the entire discussion thread click here.
in childhood, i was much touched by the movies like titanic and such other love stories but when i saw a hindi movie: "amar prem", i understood the actual meaning of love. It is not only between handsome guy and a beautiful lady but also between others, even between a person and nature.
ReplyDeleteThese movies like titanic, twilight, etc are the preachers of such romantic jokes